Emo, down, sad, blah blah life sucks.

This just have to have been a pretty unlucky and bad year...
So much troubles, lack of trust and crap.
How i wish i could just turn back the clock to 7/26/10,
And just hold everything in and wait..
Maybe if i wasn't in such a rush to get my life back, these things won't have happened.
Yea i made a great friend, and yea it all ended just after a month.
But how i wish it was more and longer, then maybe things won't have turned out this way.
Trust just doesn't work that way i guess, no matter what i say no one will believe me..
How i wish i can just turn back the clock a week and change what happened then.
Once fail and you will always fail...

Ame.. yea right, this can only be a dream and no more. I just don't feel that longing for her anymore. Maybe abit... but thats all. When other people ask " Do you still like ame?" My ans will always be "maybe" maybe i should say no now...

Brenda.. no matter how much i wish.. it can never never never ever happen. Even if i want it soooo bad that i just want to die on the ground one fine day.. and locked in me where just all the memories we had. Sometimes i will just stare at the sky all day and just want to cry. When i was asked " How about brenda, do you still like her" the ans was always "yes... but how i wish i could" i guess i should say no now.. with the words " trust can never be regained, so its over."

I just wish to die..right now and leave everything i have be.
People smoke, take drugs and such to escape from reality, i would never give into that.
But instead.. i just want to end it all in 1 go.
I am not strong, i just relie on others to be strong.. without them.. i just crumble

Once again.. i am single.

Name: Lusicous ( Brenda Jae )
Duration: 1month
It was a short one month, but i had fun.. lots of fun. My only pity in this relationship was that all i ever fed you where missing info. And in the end, everything came crashing down. I will miss all the chocolate bathes, sunsets and bed moments. Once again, i am sorry for all that i have done. I wish we could redo this relationship, but by then it was already too late. You have a tight school life ahead. So time meeting will be scares. You maybe a whore and may have done drugs, but i knew i could change it. The happiest moment i had in this was when you told me you will quit drugs for me. I will forever cherish this short memories i have of you.
Sorry, bunny...

On the day i asked you if you like me and i asked you out, i was worried about what others think of me. Now i just want you but its already been too late.
I am still gonna make the blog, maybe holding on to it as the last key memory of our relationship.

You never miss anything till you lose it.
This time.. i am all alone, i wonder if i can ever stand up again..